Alright, I will try this out. One day without shoes. No big deal. It's what all the trendy, hipster kids do right? I really don't think I had any other reasoning for doing TOMS Day Without Shoes other than that it was trendy and the want to be different like all the hipster kids. Oh, and to maybe raise some awareness on the side because raising awareness is trendy too.
And with that, I had already started out the day on the wrong foot. (ha, see what I did there?)
I woke up 25 minutes before my alarm went off this morning. I was anxious. TOMS Day Without Shoes was officially about to begin. All these thoughts rushed inside my head: I was nervous about it being uncomfortable and gross, right? Umm, not so much. I was more concerned that people would stare at me. What would everyone think of me?
And in those brief moments that morning, I realized that I am not a trendy, hipster. I could never be a trendy hipster because I do not have that compulsive need to be different. I want to blend in and not draw any attention to myself. It was a harsh reality to admit to myself.
But those harsh realities only got harsher throughout the day.
For some reason I stuck it out. I am not sure how I did it. Possibly the hardest moment that day was going down the elevator that morning. You think elevator small talk is awkward? Try elevator silent judgment. Because that was happening. I knew it was. Everyone was staring at my feet and everyone thought I was weird. Okay, that probably wasn't happening but that is what I thought because I like to convince myself that the world revolves around me. I thought all eyes were on me all morning. Especially when I didn't see anyone else barefoot for awhile. Why was I doing this in the first place? Oh, that's right, to fulfill my dreams of being a trendy, hipster kid, that's right.
But somewhere in the middle of the day, maybe when I saw other people barefoot and accepted the fact I was neither trendy nor a hipster, my eyes really started to open. Yes, they were physically opening because I was noticing more people barefoot, but they were metaphorically opening to the root of TOMS Day Without Shoes: Awareness. Oh, that's what I was supposed to be focusing on. Okay, that makes more sense.
And if anything, I think the whole experience raised more awareness for myself. How egotistical am I if I wake up in the morning concerned what people are going to think if I don't wear shoes. The point was for people to notice, the point was for people to ask. Here I was more concerned what people would think about me than what people would think about people all over the world who have injuries and diseases that could easily be prevented by shoes and feet hygiene. How selfish am I? I cared more what people thought of me than kids dying everyday from preventable diseases. As I saw more and more people barefoot and as I stepped on more and more rocks and experienced more and more discomfort, I became smaller and the cause became bigger. Because the cause is so much bigger than I am. How humbled I was today!
Today's successes: 2 Sore feet and 1 humbled Kathleen
http://www.toms.com/our-movement
Because that is why I should have walked barefoot today.
I am made smaller and God is made bigger. Oh, how he humbles me everyday.
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